today
What day of the week was today?
I don’t remember.
Do you ever have days like that?
I awoke to chaos in my room.
It came to meet me in my bed, actually.
In the form of a two and half foot screeching two-year-old who had experienced a bad dream about lions and monkeys and tigers.
And here it is – some 14 hours later.
I don’t think I heard anyone call me by my given name.
What did I even do today?
Uh.
I watched Otto conquer two steps.
And then I watched two steps conquer Otto.
Twice.
Little bruiser.
For 14 hours today
14 hours in a row
someone was near me –
tapping, touching, asking, whining, showing, clinging, hugging.
There was no moment when this was not true.
14 hours.
I exaggerate not.
I didn’t see the outside world until 5:30 p.m. – I don’t actually know why it took me so long to step outside.
It seems I simply never made it that far to the door.
I
am
spent.
Exhausted.
But here’s something interesting.
I realized something pretty startling to me.
Something I almost missed.
Just about overlooked.
But am so grateful I did not.
Despite the loudness, the running, the chaos reverberating against the walls of our house because it was just too hot to play outside,
I didn’t lose my temper today.
My discipline was not anger-based
(although there was loads of it dished out).
I was pretty calm.
I laughed.
We read books.
We made monkey bread.
The kids put on a show from the story we read.
(It involved more mess, more loud noises, more jumping and more shouting.)
We cleaned.
We made messes.
Laundry was folded
and folded
and folded
and put away.
We were busy – very little television was watched.
And through it all
one thing
remained true.
One thing remained steady.
Through absolutely no strength of my own.
With absolutely no praise due in my direction.
God was enough.
I was sustained.
And I don’t know how
exactly.
(There was no voice from the heavens. No hand reached out to pick me up.)
Or,
rather,
I do know how
exactly.
He was sufficient.
Simply sufficient.
And He showed up in a hundred little ways
and that made this day of exhaustion better.
14 hours later,
and I think I didn’t accomplish anything
and you might think that too about your day.
But you did.
And so did I.
I served my family three meals. You probably did too. That’s huge. Colossal really.
(And good meals – one from an Eating Well magazine even. That has to count for something – right?)
I met a tangible need my family had. To provide strength and sustenance from food.
I did that.
I read books and stories to my children.
I put on a band-aid (which wasn’t exactly necessary for her physical well-being, but maybe it helped her mental well-being).
I settled arguments, oversaw crafty activities and monitored chores.
I mothered my young crew.
I am exhausted from the sheer demands of normal life.
I am.
But I am not defeated.
And I will be able to wake up tomorrow and do this job again.
Not because I am strong.
But because God is.
5 Comments
Brant
Lacey, one of the best things I have read in a long time. God bless you sister. Don't ever forget their is honor, and peace, and joy, and strength, in doing exactly what God called you to do that day. What a mighty blessing you received that day, and now have shared with us. Thank you!
Brant
laceykeigley
Thanks Brant!
It was good to catch up with you the other night as well! I am so glad you come along and read here!
nikkie
thanks for this.
i'm tired.
in so very many ways.
and this reminded me that He is not tired, nor will He ever be.
Christine Lewis
Thanks, I needed that. I have been taking a Bible study at my church, every other Thursday, that has been reiterating the same message you are stating here: that, even though we, as mothers, don't think we're doing any thing great by staying home with our children, especially on days where all we're doing is playing and doing chores — we are doing something big. We are growing children, little minds, little spirits that will one day be an influence on this world, be it great or small. We are still doing God's work.
laceykeigley
You are doing real work.
Real – important – work.