confessions of a bad soccer mom
I am a bad soccer mom.
I purposely park the stroller at the end of the field where no one else is.
I usually don’t stroll right up to the line of canvas foldable chairs and picnic blankets placed down the sidelines.
I’m not that mom that the whole team knows and who hugs and high-fives all the little players as they exit the field.
That’s not me.
I don’t know why exactly.
I don’t dislike those people.
Shoot, I don’t even know those people.
I think
maybe
I feel
inadequate.
I am usually late. Soccer uniform-clad kids rushing down the hill before Kevin and I wheel the double stroller down the gravelly mountain side to find our spots.
I never have folding chairs for our family. Or even a blanket. Man, I don’t even have a clean, extra t-shirt that I can sit on so my bum doesn’t soak up the dew still remaining on the grass.
Folding chairs? Yeah. I’m not sure anyone except London ate breakfast (and that’s only because the kid refuses to skip a meal – she’s motivated by her stomach). A banana is waiting in my bag for Wilder’s breakfast and Piper is eating handfuls of Frosted Flakes for a healthy start. It took thirty minutes to locate three uniforms and Riley spent the entire car ride over to the field wrangling Bergen into his shin guards in the backseat. No folding chairs here, okay?
Each week I hear parents cheerfully encouraging my mini-athletes. Yelling their names and swapping details of last week’s game’s highs and lows.
I’m not even consistently sure of when each of my own children are on the field. I get distracted sometimes and miss entire important plays. Every week I try to relearn the other team members’ names.
I’m pretty sure I just don’t measure up.
And that’s why I usually stay back. Park our double stroller by the goal. Stay clear of the line of communication.
You know – fear.
But I am all about demolishing that stronghold, right?
So guess what I did at last weekend’s soccer game?
After initially parking said stroller at our usual corner, I decided to move on over to the main strip. The sidelines. The folding chairs. The other parents.
And after I accomplished that, guess what else I did?
I opened my mouth.
I spoke to those other parents. I asked them questions about their kids. I memorized every kid’s name on Bergen and Mosely’s soccer team. (Chaz, James, Michael, Joseph, Jake). I cheered for them by name. I made small talk. Even introduced myself to several people.
And it was alright.
And next week,
well,
I’ll do it again.
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11 Comments
Rachael
i think this may be one of my favorite blog posts lace….i love it…and it encourages me….i too am very fearful of the unknown….i always assume the worst about people and how they will treat me…..thats not fair to them…so thanks for writing about this. looooooooooooove you!
rach
alece
that is no small thing, lacey. way to push yourself out of your comfort zone — to intentionally risk and stretch…. i need to do that today. not on the soccer sidelines, but in something. anything. i need to push myself.
Becky Nifong
Oh Lacey I do the same thing! Out of fear I prefer to stick to myself in crowds of strangers, 'cause they can't make me feel lousy about myself if I never give them the chance to meet me right? This shy scared-of-rejection little girl is so proud of you!
Marie from Germany
dear lacey,
i truely think you are one of the coolest soccer moms – just because you don't feel comfortably by jumping, yelling, cheering, waving, punishing the referee and his or her skills in a rude manner on the sideline…. As what i have experienced there are some weird moms out there … And i think it is awesome that you write about your struggle at soccer games of the little ones.
I send you a huge German soccer player hug!!
love
Marie
laceykeigley
Thank you sweet Marie.
And I hug you back!
Sarah D.
well, mrs. mary wickstrum used to sit up on the hill looking over the soccer fields…..in the comfort of her CAR. I am totally scarred for life from my bad soccer mom 😉
laceykeigley
That actually makes me feel better. Shoot- why haven’t I thought about staying in the car?
Ellen S
I feel your pain. Thank you for being brave.
nikkie
i get what you're saying.
from one upwards soccer mom to another, i get it.
keep pressing on, my friend. and i'll do the same.
Lacey Keigley
confessions of a bad soccer mom http://bit.ly/9X0SQG
shelley
Wow! Sounds like this season's soccer season is about a lot more than soccer!! As another fear-fighter, I know every little step like this is HUGE!!