Hey-o.  Friday it is.  Short days – long week, am I right?

I maybe made it worse on myself by catching up on This Is Us on two different nights so I was past my bedtime twice this week.  (Past my bedtime.  Who am I kidding?  I don’t even have an assigned bedtime and that’s a real problem.)

 

 

funny

 

I woke up one morning this week to a text.  “We are still meeting, right?”

To which I was forced to respond with honesty – “Right.  Yes.  We are.  That’s exactly why I am still in bed in my pajamas.  Because we are meeting.”

Who’s the grown up here?

Funnier than that – because that actually wasn’t funny – is this question from my son.  “Mom, how much do you think just my head weighs?”

And also equally funny is this car rental video from my friend Tyler.  (The video is great, but his wig is magnificent.)

 

 

I always think these guys are hilarious.  But I feel especially drawn to this car rental video because last week I had what I thought was a fantastic experience renting a car through Enterprise turn into what was actually a pretty disappointing and annoying experience renting a car through Enterprise.  Which is a bummer as Enterprise is the ONLY car rental agency available directly in my town.

 

fashionable

 

Nope, nothing here this week. 

You’re hearing from a woman who slept in a skirt one night and then got out of bed and wore that same skirt the entire next day.

This is NOT my week to report on fashion in any way, shape or form.

 

flavorful

 

Also, nothing to see here.  Maybe I shouldn’t have even tried to post at all today.  It’s beginning to look that way, right?  (I gave you THREE funny things though, okay?  That’s gotta count for something.)

This week Mosely had a night that she was in charge of supper.  For her birthday she received a Harry Potter cookbook – an unofficial one – but full of Harry Potter recipes nonetheless.  She chose and created Onion Soup.  Which I found a surprising choice for her, frankly.  Otto jumped in and volunteered to make Irish Soda Bread with the soup.  Alright, cool.  Go for it, kids.

Both turned out pleasantly delicious.  But I have no recipes to give you from either.

 

faithful

 

Well now, here I have something, but I am never certain how these sort of thoughts will translate.

Our house is still cold and one afternoon I wanted to be warm.  The sun was shining brightly so I walked outside my kitchen door to the nearest patch of sunshine.  I stood still.  Tilted my face to the sky.  Closed my eyes.  And waited.

Waited for the sun to permeate through my skin.  For the warmth from the rays to reach my face.  Eventually it was hot on my skin, just there in that beam of sunlight.

And I said words to myself.  Because although it’s been mostly a good week, there have been pitfalls and landmines that I’ve both skirted and fell victim to.  And the words I said sounded a little like this, “God.  You see me.  I know you see me.  You said you see me.  You see the situation …………….. and you see the place where my back’s against the wall  ………………….. and you see the need our family has in this direction ………………….. and you see the pain I am struggling through on this front ……………………. and the way in which I don’t understand your motives over here with this part of my story ……………………..  You see me.  So.  I’m just reminding you – God, you see me.”

Because, I know.  He does.

 

feels

 

Everyone has different feelings about movies.  That’s good.

I watched The Greatest Showman recently.  I’ve read articles about its lack of authenticity in telling the true story of PT Barnum.  About how it’s not the real picture.  And I know we let Hollywood seep into our consciences in ways of which we aren’t even aware.  We believe lies that are shiny and bright because they’re pretty and they make us feel good.

I doubt anyone would walk out of the theatre and think that the picture presented in The Greatest Showman is an actual true to life representation of who PT Barnum was and what he stood for.  I hope they would not, in fact.  I hope viewers would not believe that the story in that hour and half is the whole story.  It’s a musical for goodness sake.  It’s more important to producers on a screen to make the words flow and the rhythm attractive than it is important to tell the truth.

So there’s my disclaimer that I somehow felt obligated to offer.  

And now this other stuff …

I. Loved. The. Movie.

I thought it was so much fun.  It was grand and beautiful and big screen worthy.  It felt large and special and I’m glad I saw it.  (I’d see it again, in fact, and that is terribly unlike me.)

So many fun parts and uplifting themes and stellar moments.

Once, when Barnum was convincing a character to be brave, to join his adventure, and she was afraid of being laughed at and judged and misunderstood, Barnum said to her, “They don’t understand.  But they will.”

And I love that scene, but even in the theatre i couldn’t stop from thinking, “Or they won’t.”  They may not ever understand.  Or even try to understand.  You may be laughed at.

And although Barnum didn’t utter any words like I was thinking, another song from the movie did.  (And that’s one scene where tears fell from my eyes.)  Because although I was thinking (and have known) times when people don’t understand, there’s this rewarding other side to that too that came out in the song “This Is Me” and I think it’s the answer to the fear of being misunderstood.

Maybe it was my favorite song.  (I say maybe because the songs were so good and so much fun and we’ve been singing them around the house on repeat.  And loudly.)

I love the lyrics – it’s an anthem, a fight song ——

I am not a stranger to the dark.
“Hide away,” they say
“Cause we don’t want your broken parts.”
I’ve learned to be ashamed of all my scars.
“Run away,” they say.
“No one’ll love you as you are.”

But I won’t let them break me down to dust.
I know that there’s a place for us –
For we are glorious.

When the sharpest words wanna cut me down,
I’m gonna send a flood, gonna drown them out.
I am brave, I am bruised
I am who I’m meant to be, this is me.
Look out ’cause here I come
And I’m marching on to the beat I drum.
I’m not scared to be seen
I make no apologies, this is me.

 

 

___________________________