Chaos

before bed . . .

I clean up dinner.

Tidy the living room.

Tuck the kids in

Lock all the doors.

Pause at the sound of the dogs barking.

Wonder if I should be worried.

Stare into the darkness

and contemplate my Aloneness.

I sigh

so deeply I think I might fade into a puddle on my dirty dining room floor when all of my breath is finally expelled.

I feel old.

Independent in the most uncomfortable of ways.

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