This Season at Our House
Celebrating the Christmas season with these guys is always a good time.
But this year has been especially pleasant and low-key.
I think it’s because we have jumped off the traditional Christmas train entirely.
And by “traditional” I am primarily talking about the exchanging and purchasing of gifts.
Our tree’s base is not overflowing with presents large and small wrapped in cheerful Christmas attire.
Not that there’s a problem with that if the floor surrounding your tree doesn’t look like ours.
This isn’t anyone else’s story – it’s our story.
We are not giving and receiving regular gifts this year.
What we are doing is this:
Filling the stockings with stocking-sized treats.
Encouraging the kids to make one another presents or to give up one of their own favorite toys to their siblings.
Planning to spend the day enjoying one another and creating a special craft that the kids have been longing to make.
We’ve been on the road to this kind of Christmas for several years now I think.
Which makes this transition to No Gifts neither a very shocking nor a very difficult decision at our house.
Honestly, no child has even complained once.
(At least not in our presence.)
We’ve been discouraging store-bought gifts among the siblings for several years now.
A few years ago we took a family adventure instead of buying presents.
And since London was born we have embraced the three-gift only rule of present-purchasing.
This year our decision to go gift-less was primarily driven by finances.
But now that we are three days away from the actual day itself, it has been amazing to see how calm and restful this holiday season has become by simply removing that shopping element from the picture.
There’s been no mad rush at our house.
No last minute frenzy.
No overwhelming list of last-minute chores and gifts and the endless desire to make sure every kid gets treated equally and all piles look the same.
We are still giving the kids their new Christmas pajamas on Christmas Eve.
(Although I could argue that’s a tradition of necessity more than Christmas spirit. And if you’ve seen what our kids have been sleeping in lately, I am certain you would agree.)
These school-free days have been filled with long hours of hanging out in our new rooms making projects together and swinging on the rope swing outside in this incredibly mild start to winter.
Mosely and I have been learning to make buckeyes and calzones together.
The girls have taken to playing board games and Bergen has been reading Magic Tree House books non-stop, three and four at a time. (Suddenly he’s a storehouse of knowledge about the Titanic and Queen Elizabeth.)
And, it is the truth, I promise, I don’t miss the shopping part of Christmas at all.
At all, I tell you.
I don’t feel as if we are robbing our children of the Christmas experience and I don’t think we are ruining their memories.
I think our children are receiving an incredibly beautiful gift this year.
It’s called . . .
contentment.
13 Comments
Sally
it feels good to not be alone in this. thank you for sharing, and i know that your next few days will be particularly sweet!
Kristie
Lacey – I love your post. Thank you for sharing this. I am really thinking on the same page as you – but we have not made that step yet. Our problem is well meaning family members – who want to bless our kids and who live so far away from them – have you had to address this with family?
LaceyKeigley
Actually Kristie – I don't have much advice on this topic.
Our family dynamic is quite different and an excess of gifts is not an issue. I think you could certainly talk to them if you feel so led, but I also think different people show love in different ways. Maybe if it's important to them to shower your kids with gifts that way, you can teach your kids to be gracious receivers as well and let it go at that. I think kids can tell the differences pretty fast between what parents allow and what other relatives allow.
🙂
Jane
Lacey, I think that is a perfect Christmas. That is how I've always pictured it. All of my gifts have been homemade this year. I love it!
LaceyKeigley
Ahhh – let's be honest.
THIS is what I have missed about the blog.
The comments.
In a world where my days are spent searching for missing socks and wiping chocolate off foreheads, I love this interaction with grown ups.
Thank you guys!
Jenny P.
This is great! In our house the sentiment has been "we need to cut back" or "next year, let's do less" and so it has gone for the past few years including this year. I told my hubby that we really need to come up with a plan for next year now, so we'll actually follow through. I think next year will be the year. I have already prepared my half of the extended family for the gift free decision and they were okay with it (at least with the adults not getting gifts). I cringe every time my children open a gift and then ask for more. I want them to be content and learn the art of giving. Thanks for your post!
LaceyKeigley
I hear you – I spend so much time saying "in the future" or "next year" without actually following through.
And our kids still struggle with the desire to want more too – all the time. It's a tough battle. Even (and especially) for us grown ups too.
Rachel
I love this. And I love that you aren't snarky and judgmental about it. You are just telling us what works for you and your family. You aren't trying to make us feel badly or less holy if we are exchanging gifts or whatever.
And I hear you on the shopping. I hate shopping. We have money set aside, so it's not a money issue. I just hate stores. And crowds. And people 🙂
LaceyKeigley
Thank you Rachel.
It helps that I despise shopping too. And crowds. In fact, I am holding my breath today because at our house – we do love a birthday – and it's Mosely's today. Her request for several YEARS has been a trip to Build A Bear. This year we're making that wish come true. But guess where Build A Bear is located? The MALL!!! And of course her birthday happens to be three days before Christmas. Yikes!
I usually shop online – that's where I bought all the kids pajamas this year – love that delivery right to my door with no store to wade through.
Chelsea
Yes, I love this too. We have always done three gifts. Their stocking, something homemade, something store bought. It makes for a very simple Christmas where there is no focus on presents. This year Tristan sent a letter to the whole family asking them not to give him any presents but just money so that he can sponsor a Compassion kid. He is so excited about that, and I love how he's bucking the system and doing something of value. The kids have requested clementines and Christmas candy in their stockings. Love it. You know our budget it tight, too, so being able to get through Christmas with hardly any money spent and instead quality time, delicious baked goods, and memories? I call that a success. Maybe next year we'll be as bold as you and do no gifts at all. I doubt the kids would notice or care. :o) Merry Christmas!!!
LaceyKeigley
The Compassion idea? How great that Tristan is taking that initiative. What a truly precious moment.
And I think it's so sweet and simple at this age when kids really want oranges in their stockings – so Little House on the Prairie. Love it!
Kevin Keigley
I love this.
Bryan
Pretty cool.